There have been a couple occurrences in the past 2 weeks or so that have made me start wondering if Della is somewhat clairvoyant.

Almost 2 weeks ago, I learned that one of my best friend’s father had lost his battle with pancreatic cancer. Then the following morning, I found out that the very best friend of one of my cousins had died suddenly and unexpectedly. They were both wonderful men, the latter a life cut far, far too short. My cousin’s friend was only in his mid-30s, perfect health, amazing spirit, and leaves behind an equally young wife and a baby girl who just turned 1. My heart still breaks every time I think of his passing, because it’s just so unfair on so many levels. Tragic doesn’t even begin to describe it.

But back to Della.

Shortly after I learned about my cousin’s friend, I was looking at a picture of the 2 of them on Facebook. Della asked who that was, and I told her it was Ethan and his friend Jim. (we had just spent some time with Ethan and the rest of my family in Tucson for another cousin’s wedding, so he was fresh in her memory.) Out of nowhere, Della asked, “Did Jim die?”

Woah, what the? I was honestly speechless.

I had mentioned nothing about either man dying out loud that morning, because it was just me and the girls at home. I had been talking to Ryan about it via messages on the computer, but there’s no way Della would have known what I was typing about. And I had been tearing up looking at pictures of Jim and reading tributes about him, but when Della was in the room and asked if he had died I wasn’t even visibly upset at all.

So I told her that yes, Jim did die. She asked why, and I said well, his heart got really sick and stopped being able to pump all the good blood through his body that helps us live. (she’s been curious about why people die lately, and i’ve tried to take a pseudo-scientific tack that a 3 year old would understand. not being very religious or spiritual myself, i tend to steer away from the god and heaven parts and more toward the well sometimes when people’s bodies get really old or sick, they don’t work right anymore and they just stop being alive. and yes, she’s asked if we will die, and i’ve said yes, we’ll die someday too, but not for a long time. and when we do, don’t worry. we’ll all see each other again someday. i really do believe that part, just not necessarily that it’ll be behind pearly gates. more in a sense like we’ll all just be waiting for each other to get the party started again on the other side. in our best eras, not in the sickly or unfortunate ways in which we may leave this earthly body. it seems to work and be satisfactory for her.)

Fast forward to last week Tuesday. Della was with me in our bedroom, and I think I was making the bed, or some such mundane daily task. Completely unprompted and unrelated to anything we had been talking about that morning, she asked me if we were going to hear that song that Daddy and I were dancing to in that picture at our wedding. (we have 2 framed pictures of us from our first dance in the dining room that we always look at.)

That day was our anniversary. Again, something about which she knew nothing.

I was speechless again. I just had to laugh and said why yes, we actually might hear that song today, because today is the same day Daddy and I got married, just 8 years later. Then that night all 4 of us danced to “At Last”, our wedding song.

Then Wednesday of last week it happened again. I work at the gym Wednesday mornings and I asked her how she wanted to wear her hair as we were getting ready to go, and at first she said “regular hair”, meaning down with no piggies or clips. Then she changed her mind and wanted a ponytail, because her friend Josie (who’s always there on Wednesdays) might wear piggies that day. Well sure shit, when we got to the kids room, there was Josie. With pigtails.

This is crazy!

Am I reading too much into this? Are these just extremely odd coincidences? Or are kids just really, incredibly intuitive, picking up on stuff that our adult brains are much too crowded to catch?

Or does she really have a little extra sense of perception that the rest of us lack?

Ryan said he was clairvoyant as a kid, too, and that it does run in families. Is that true? Or was he simply testing my gullibility yet again? And if he wasn’t just yanking my chain, why would people stop being clairvoyant?

Either way, this is just 1 more thing to add to the list of how this child never ceases to amaze me.






Eight years

April 8, 2014



And now…


Think we’ve changed much?

Happy anniversary to me and Ryan! 8 awesome years so far, and counting.

May there be 80 more. Well, probably not 80, but hopefully a lot!




Strength, or insanity?

April 2, 2014

So we all know how well things were going last week before our trip to Tucson. Well lucky for me, the fun just continued…

As soon as we boarded our flight on the way out, Lana turned into that kid. Screaming, writhing, kicking, flailing, coughing, snotting, you name it. She was utterly out of control. She was on a lap, then seconds later lying in the aisle picking specks of who-knows-what off the floor. At least she was hoarse, so her cries weren’t as ear-piercing as they could have been.

At one point either right before or during takeoff (see, i’m already trying to block the whole episode from memory) she was so fiendish, I literally had to pin her body against me to keep her from hitting everyone and everything around me with her flying limbs. I knew she was completely exhausted from her cold and lack of sleep, so I just held her as tightly to me as possible, which worked. She finally passed out after a few minutes, unfortunately only for about half an hour. Of the 4-hour flight.

I kept apologizing profusely to the people around us, who thankfully were saints. Every single one said not to worry, they all have multiple kids, and even the young girl across the aisle in front of me and Lana engaged her when she toddled up to her arm rest instead of rolling her eyes at me. The man seated in the middle of the row behind me leaned forward during this first outburst and said, “Do NOT apologize.” It brought me to tears, because I was horrified by Lana’s fit and was afraid he was going to yell at me.

And did you notice I said first outburst?

Yeah, it happened again at the end of the flight. You have no idea how relieved we were to get off that damn plane and get her out of there. I almost raided the drink cart for all the tiny liquor bottles I could find. Of course Della was her usual calm, happy self, or else I really would have lost my mind.

Fortunately that was about the worst of the trip, for every day their colds got better, so did Lana’s attitude. Mostly. She still needs to work on her listening skills, but I’ll cut her some slack since she is only 17 months old.

And thank god I almost always had plenty of helping hands close by since Ryan couldn’t go. We traveled both ways with my mom and step-dad; stayed with my sister, brother-in-law, and nephew; and were surrounded by family pretty much all the time. That saying about it taking a village to raise a child? It has never rung more true than on this trip.

I’m afraid I came back more exhausted than when we left and experiencing a return of my cold, though. The constant stream of making sure the little ones always had everything they needed meant I pretty much always came last. Is the diaper bag full – diapers, wipes, changes of clothes, snacks, pj’s, my wallet? Do we have the swim stuff – swim diapers, sunscreen, pool toys, floats, sunglasses, hats? Do we have the eating stuff – bibs, cups, kid spoons, kid forks? Are they bathed and free from the puke that keeps landing on them from their coughing fits?

I honestly barely figured out what to wear to the wedding, just making sure the girls’ outfits were set and they were taken care of first. I’m actually happy with what I wore, though. It was simple and comfortable, which became of utmost importance since I had to stand outside the ceremony the entire time holding Lana, who refused to sit with me from the moment my butt tried to touch a chair when we arrived at the hotel. At least my arms got a workout.

I’m not sure why I’m complaining, though. I guess just to get it off my chest and out of my head. This is my job as a parent, right? They are what’s most important, and especially being the only parent with them halfway across the country I had to be extra alert and prepared. It was just really tiring. Mentally and physically. I often found myself wondering if taking this trip showed I could handle things with them fine, or if it just meant I was certifiably nuts.

Don’t worry – for all this woe-is-me, we did have a lot of fun. The wedding locale was beautiful, my cousin looked stunning, and spending time with my mom’s entire side of the family is something I love. Plus it doesn’t happen all that often, so I’m very happy we got to take advantage. And the girls got to play with their cousin and second cousin, which was so great to watch.




 …and demons (aw, but isn’t she a cute little dancing demon)

This tale does have a happy ending, thankfully. Both girls were absolute dreams on the flight home, even napping much of the way. So I think it really was the cold raging inside Lana that transformed her into that little demon on the way out. She’s lucky – had there been a repeat performance on the way back, I seriously would have considered getting tranquilizers for her for the flights to and from Hawaii in a few weeks. Well played, little one.


 the whole fam, minus the bride and groom. they were a little busy.


To-NOT-Do List

March 26, 2014

When preparing to fly across the country with 1 small and 1 slightly bigger toddler, here is a list of possible scenarios: Get a head cold. Pass said head cold onto both toddlers. Toddler 1 becomes so snot-filled that she does not sleep for 3 nights and counting. Toddler 2 becomes so snot-filled that she […]

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Thumbnail image for Della-isms March 13, 2014

I know I’ve been writing about her a lot lately, but I just can’t get enough of Della right now. She’s such a sweet, beautiful, curious little girl, and I love her to death. I keep meaning to get her on film saying all these things, but I haven’t gotten around to it yet. So […]

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Say ahh…

Thumbnail image for Say ahh… March 7, 2014

Della had her first trip to the dentist yesterday. It was so cute! Both the hygienist and dentist are incredible women and made her whole experience fun, so she loved it. They said her teeth look great, and we’re doing a good job brushing twice a day. We’ll start using her little flossers nightly, too, […]

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A heart of gold

Thumbnail image for A heart of gold February 25, 2014

I just can’t help but be more and more amazed by Della every day. She is, hands down, one of the kindest, gentlest, sweetest, most wonderful people I have ever known. She is so conscientious, not just for a 3-year-old, but more so than most 30-year-olds. I have been complimented on her excellent manners numerous […]

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